So Saturday night Margaret and I had the opportunity to babysit the youngest grandchild Baby P. We volunteered our services to look after the four month old prodigy so his parents could go out and celebrate his father’s thirtieth birthday. We had a weeks fair warning, nonetheless the task was somewhat daunting. It has been a number of years since either Margaret or I have had to take care of a four month old without a net. At that age they are so small and seemingly fragile, yet we decided we were up to the task. More importantly, Pierce’s parents decided that we were up to the task.
We were advised that we needed to show up early for the “briefing”. We were informed in advance that there were rules and guidelines. There was also a training on the proper procedures for bath, bottle and bed. Now as grandparents, we were at first dismissive of these terms and conditions of our, mind you, free services. After all the best knee jerk response is, “I managed to raise you and you didn’t turn out so bad” . However, if your really think about it though, the key to victory with children, especially babies, is structure and routine. You have to try and follow the same steps that Mom and Dad take every night. Besides, I remember when my parents thought is was acceptable to smoke in the car with your children and the windows rolled up.
The procedure is the important part of the briefing because getting a four month old to bed is like going through a preflight checklist for a jumbo jet. Now its only even eleven years since I had to bathe, feed and put him to bed, but the processes have become more complex. Also, the technology has improved and changed since I last put a baby to bed for the night. Nowadays there is a scale built into the changing table, a digital thermometer that lets you know that the bath water is the right temperature, an automatic dispenser that measures and makes the formula to the right mix and the right temperature and then fills the bottle like one of those coffee pod machines. That is only the beginning because when you put the little critter down to bed, the tech only ramps up.
Swaddling was not a new concept when I was a new parent, however there was substantial training at the hospital. Basically, using a couple of baby blankets you made a burrito out of your child so they would stay still and sleep. Now, there is a sock for the baby’s foot that reads his heart rate and blood oxygen levels. Then he gets wrapped in a blanket to hold his arms in place and then zipped into a case that snuggles him right up. Then he gets strapped into his bed like a fighter pilot into a cockpit. The bed, called. Snoo, then gently rocks him back and forth until he goes to sleep.
Once Mom and Dad left, so did that cocky feeling of, “yeah, I got this”. Now we are working without a net and Baby P started getting a little fussy. Understandable, his parents are his whole world. Things started getting dicey when we started bath time. Normally it’s the young man’s favorite event of the day but not tonight though. By the time we got him undressed there were some big tears. Once in the tub, we hoped the warm water would soothe the situation. And the tears would stop. That never happened. We moved through the bath routine quickly to get on to the next phase.
We split up, Margret got Baby P dressed while I made the bottle. With in minutes the young man was chilled out and taking on six ounces of food. I text Mom and Dad and they said it sounded like things were going well. While we were still troubled by the restlessness at bath, we didn’t want Mom and Dad to think we couldn’t handle it. After all, what’s the point if they have to cut date night short. We were assured that his intake was good and all was going well. Once he was done it was time to walk around the upstairs and get ready for bed.
While we were walking, the little man was letting out burps that even made this seasoned fraternity boy blush. Within a few minutes he was all chilled out and enjoyed the pacing back and forth. Dad sent a text message advising us that it was, “bed time”. So we laid him down for the swaddling process. We were no longer happy and the tears started again. Now the bedroom is alight with hi-tech monitors and sensors. The green light on one pad meant that the monitor sock was on and connected. The white noise machine was on and making sounds like the ocean was outside the bedroom door. I managed to get the little guy swaddled despite his apparent disgust. In a matter of moments he was settled into his Snoo and the bed was rocking him back and forth. He still was not happy.
With Baby P settled in bed, Margaret and I set in for what we expected to be a long night of weeping and gnashing of gums. I grabbed the iPad and set up the video monitor so we could see him in the bed. Within five minutes he called down and by ten minutes he was out. Slowly the rocking speed of the Snoo started to slow. Nothing short of amazing, if you ask me. Feeling confident that we successfully handled bath, bottle and bed we went downstairs. We ordered a pizza and it was time for our dinner. Also, it was time to give some attention to the other grandchild in the house, Boone the 8 year old Labrador Retriever.
Our confidence in our skills in babysitting was quickly confirmed. Apparently we were being watched on the “nanny cam” and our exploits were the subject of Mom and Dad’s dinner table conversation with their other young professional friends. Margaret and I ate our Pizza and even gave some to the dog, which is against the rules but apparently was not on the “nanny cam” . After figuring out the television downstairs, we relaxed until Mom and Dad came back home at 10:30 p.m. We were relieved of out post and Margaret and I went back home for the night.
The adventure in grandparent babysitting was both easier and harder that I expected in equal measures. As parents, we tend to have a built in mechanism that makes us forget just how much work babies can be. Probably so we keep having more and perpetuating the species. It is also so rewarding to spend time with a little child and see their excitement at everything. I look forward to the next adventure, however knowing that I am going to be on camera, fair warning to Mom and Dad, I just might make it much more interesting to watch.
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